Good evening everyone. It was a beautiful day again today. Clear skies and sunny. I hope it was a great one for all of you.
I want to talk a little tonight on the topic of bullies. Bullies are often referred to in regards to children and our youth, but small bullies usually turn into bigger, older bullies. We have all encountered them at one time or another. We have all learned in our own ways that standing up to a bully is the only real way of stopping one. I have so much to say on this topic , but I will keep the topic to a minimum because it came up today in my family.
My 6 year old son, Jack came off of the school bus yesterday with my 7 year old daughter Juliette. I have my 4 year old son Jordan with me too, when I go and pick them up. With all of the chatter between the children, I remember hearing in passing Jack saying something about a backpack hitting him in the head. I quickly said “Be careful Jack. Tell your friends not to play so roughly.” And we went about the rest of the evening, not discussing it again.
Today at the bus stop, when my children got off, Jack looked upset. I asked him what was wrong and he wasn’t really answering. I noticed he had a red mark on his upper forehead. I said “Jack , what happened to your head?!”. Juliette stepped in and said “That boy threw his backpack at jacks head again on the bus”. I said “WHAT?!! What boy?!! Where is he?!!!” He showed me the boy and told me his name. I said “Jack, what did you do when that boy did that to you. He said ” Nothing, I don’t want to get in trouble with the bus driver. ” I asked him how long this has been going on and he said every day. I said “This is not going to happen again , right Jack?”.
A little backstory here, my son Jack is what some might refer to as a “gentle giant”. He was born with a larger frame than my other children. His hands are big and Wide, and his feet and ankles are as well. On the contrary though, He has the softest and most beautiful heart. But because of that, he is too sweet to want to hurt someone back. I told him that it’s always best to be nice to others, but allowing a bully to continue hurting you, is something else. I told him as scared as he is, he needs to stand up to that bully and stop him in his tracks.
First I advised him to give his “meanest” look and go right up to the bully and say “HEY, you DO NOT want to see my bad side!” and walk away. But under no circumstances to smile or laugh. To let the bully see he means business. Second, I said to take the backpack that’s thrown at him and don’t give it back. To carry the backpack off of the bus, give it to me and I would walk it over to the kids father and tell him what’s going on. He told me he is afraid this boy will hit him, and it was at that point that I felt my father Barry running through my veins. I said “Jack if this kid hits you, you get up and make sure you hit him back, so he NEVER forgets.” He said “But what about the bus driver?” I said “Tell the bus driver that your mother said you have every right to defend yourself. Here’s her phone number. She said you should call her if there’s a problem with that .”
I detest bullies. In the meantime I will call the school in the morning and make sure to stop it before that boy even tries to throw it at my son one more time.
I know there is school protocol in regards to how to deal with bullying. I also know that I can step in and talk to the parents as I have done before this. But, there comes a time when each and every one must confront a bully and not back down. Or else that bully will just keep coming. I don’t promote or agree with violence, but I also don’t want my children to let people walk all over them.
This lesson follows us throughout our lives. Most times a bully will not even use violence, but instead inflict mental and emotional abuse. This also leaves scars that can last forever. You need to know that this is never acceptable under any circumstance at all. Wether it’s in school , or at home with family , or even within relationships.
Goodnight everyone.
No lives will go in vain. No pain will go unnoticed.
Love from ,
Jessica Lee Smith,
For Sammy & Family
